Leadership adrift

 We have so many seminars, webinars, global summits and workshops on this topic. One would think from all the decades of input we would be in better places, but we are in dire spaces.

My life experience and even a recent workshop has been that leadership is about loving people and leading them somewhere through your guidance and example. It’s social (people) influence. Set a vision, empower teams, collaborate, work together, lead people towards the goal. Personality of the leader and the team members plays a large role as to whether they can work together and get to the goal together. That’s a very basic understanding. There are a host of other words that come into play that can either help towards the leader and team reaching their goal in one piece or can unravel everything and no goal is met, or the team is left behind and the leader goes solo.

Communication is key. Strategy for the journey and listening will go a long way.

A good leader cares for people, listens, is patient, is honest, has integrity and humility, is vulnerable, works with interdependence and allows accountability.

A toxic leader is arrogant, uncaring, impatient, controlling, aggressive, selfish, intimidating, actively seeks to harm, is dismissive and defensive.

Who would you rather be led by?

We get into trouble when we don’t take the key elements for effective leading seriously. When one person becomes all important and loses the ability to listen and be held accountable, there will be problems. On Instagram reels they have multiple videos of different soft gel-like gadgets filled with many holes and tiny balls and as you press and squeeze on the gel lining, these little balls burst forth and go flying everywhere. This reminds me of leadership that is out of control. Total chaos and people going off in different directions and no-one doing anything towards the vision and goal. It’s just a case of picking up pieces along the way to try to start all over again. Getting nowhere slowly.

Add in some toxic leadership traits and we have science lab experiments, gone wrong, exploding everywhere.

It’s this toxicity we are seeing on display all over the world that is the most concerning. As leaders we are either going to influence people towards good or bad.

So, when we encourage something for decades, cultivate it, mainstream it, legislate it, broadcast it, what do we think the result will be? Chances are that whatever we have been selling will be bought. If it’s something bad and we make excuses for it, weaponize it and joke about it enough, that part will also be bought by those choosing to follow us.

Let’s take an example we see too much of. Let’s look at hatred and fear of one particular people group or religion.

This has happened for millennia. Most often it’s political power plays. When leaders paint an entire group of people as dangerous, terrorists and threats, that naturally leads to fear which very often leads to division, pride, hatred and violence.

It might make political sense if the only thing the leader is after is more power, land and riches. Create a target group of people. Demonize and dehumanize them. Manipulate stories and ordinary issues to fit the narrative the leaders are spinning. Create fear. Create division. Create reasons for the fear and build on the hatred. Chances of this leading to more exclusion and eventually violence are strong factors. There are huge consequences to this type of leadership. People get killed.

In many ways these leaders would see themselves as having good leadership as they have achieved their goal.

But if leadership is also social influence, then the social part should be a strong factor in play too. Are they good or bad for society or only thinking of themselves? Do we want leaders like this? Some could possibly answer yes because they are currently supporting leaders who lead like this. I certainly would want leaders that think about society as a whole and take us all towards something good. I have yet to listen to any leader speak about leadership principles and uphold toxic leadership traits. So, what’s happening? I wish I had the answers and easy solutions.

I have seen too many global leaders openly ignore people pleading with them for a different way forward. When a leader is about to speak in public and there is a public outcry against them, to see them stand still, stay silent, ignore what’s being said and sometimes smirk is so disingenuous. Sometimes there’s a retaliatory rude retort. There’s no responsibility taken in those moments. All we see is pride and arrogance. It’s ultimately a mask of weakness, cover-up and inability to lead well.

There’s also leadership through social media influencers. Some of these are outright toxic. Watching a documentary on Netflix called ‘Inside the Manosphere’, I came away with learning about some men who get famous from posting offensive and dodgy content. They are firstly anti-establishment and live by their own set of rules. They show off their women, riches and physical prowess. They might not agree morally with everything they are involved in, but they openly say they will profit from it without blinking. Flirting, humiliating people, multiple partners, one-sided monogamy, terrible views and treatment of women and girls, dominance, aggression, getting close to political power and aiming at notoriety. Doing good is not enough to get popular but bad behaviour sells. It seems to be all about one person being better than anyone else.  Male supremacy, hate speech and misinformation – anything to get people’s attention and make money. And this is celebrated and followed by way too many young boys and men as some kind of leadership. I shake my head in disbelief, and yet it’s very real, and very concerning.

Leaders in the church also come under scrutiny, sometimes more harshly as the expectations are higher. They have the highest authority that they answer to, and they have the example of Jesus to emulate. We know they are human and they too have sometimes made choices to run after money, power and control, but those are not goals in the kingdom of God.

God speaks harshly to leaders who actively lead others astray and who point people in the direction of things that are the opposite of the kingdom of God. We have leaders in different countries around the world who will speak the language of Christianity and it sounds kind of great and okay. They speak of reset, rededicate and renewal and turning back to God and standing against evil forces in the world, but many times their words are empty because their actions are speaking louder. Sometimes it’s lack of action. If that same nation that is under God also stands for cruelty, exclusion, greed, war, dehumanizing people, making life miserable for the poor, selfishness, hatred, aggression and controlling people, then something is not adding up. Something looks and sounds fake and far away from authentic. That is not a nation under God or kingdom of God language or leadership.

The one place we can safely run to that does have answers is the kingdom of God. We can hold up what we are unsure of against the backdrop of Jesus and his kingdom and we can figure out what is really true and authentic. As followers of Jesus we do have answers in him and in his leadership. A leader with all the authority of the world on his shoulders and yet all humility, grace and mercy within him. Sincerity through and through. He is all about inclusion and society working well for everyone. He has no toxic leadership traits in him and speaks openly against them.

Jesus is absolutely devoted to God, obedient and submitted to the will of his father in heaven. He is always bold and courageous and stands up for the marginalized, the vulnerable and exploited. He offers radical forgiveness, including towards those who wrong him. He displays integrity and moral purity. What he says adds up with what he does. He has deep love, empathy and compassion for all people. He is truth and honesty. He does not put on a show. He is genuine and true.

We are told that we are made in the image of God, each and every person on this earth. If a leader is leading us towards fear and hatred of others, first of all that is not of God, and secondly, we combat this by doing what Jesus told us to do. Love your neighbour as yourself. Let God’s image in us love God’s image in them. Look at them and look for his image in them. We cannot let worldly leaders influence us to do any differently than that. We are called to honour and show deep respect to the person and the image of God in the person in front of us, no matter who they are.

As Raymond Chang said, “The gospel does not allow us the luxury of remaining neutral or disengaged when it comes to the unjust treatment of those made in God’s image. From Genesis to Revelation, Scripture tells a bigger story and calls us to a costly love for neighbour.”

Let us all take up the leadership banner and lead like Jesus did. Not towards power, platform, image, greed, controlling others, status, war and dominance, but towards humility, servant leadership, obedience, peacemaking, faithfulness, a hunger for justice and righteousness, mercy, forgiveness and repentance, moving towards the overlooked, keeping our eyes on the one that is pure and loving with his sacrificial love.