How are our levels of hate doing?

Hate, like love, is a learned behaviour.

This is a lean in and listen blog. We need to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. If you feel triggered, please stop and breathe and then continue reading. 

So, how are we doing with our levels of hate? Is it something we take the time to evaluate? This maybe seems like a strange question to ask, but there is just way too much hate around currently. It’s not going to take us to good places. It’s the opposite of God’s Shalom which is peace, flourishing and wholeness for all. God condemns human hatred. He calls it destructive. He declares that if we say we love God, but hate our brother and sister, we are liars. He calls us to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us. Hating sin, evil and injustice is aimed at the sin, evil and injustice, not at the people. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of this world. Our fight is a spiritual one, not a people against people one. Hatred of people is never the answer or the way forward.

Do we have categories for our hate? Why are we so okay with hating? The jokes, the snide and hurtful comments, the heart reaction or the visceral response.

Are we okay with being the reason that someone feels unloved, not accepted, unwelcome, not enough, too much, discriminated against and less than?

Where did we learn our hate?
Whose worldview taught us to hate?
Are we okay with passing our hate onto our children?

Do we really believe that all people, no matter their race, religion, age, physical or mental abilities, sex or gender are worthy of respect and dignity?

Should all people, as in people made in the image of God, and just to be clear, that really is all people, should they have basic human rights and be accepted as people?

I teach and train in Protective Behaviours, which is personal body safety life skills. These are taught in an attempt to abuse proof children and to bring the levels of sexual abuse down in our world. One of our themes is ‘We all have the right to feel safe at all times.’ Sounds pretty much like something that most people would agree with. It has caused me to do some deep thinking.

All is well and good until it’s not! Until we have something in our worldview that pokes its head up and says no to that. Until it’s someone we have been taught to hate. Then, suddenly, in our personal opinion, they lose that right to safety.

It doesn’t seem to matter in those moments that our South African Constitution and global human rights organisations uphold that respect and dignity do extend to each and every person. No-one left out, everyone included.

Are we okay with being the reason someone feels hated? Are we okay that they feel cast aside and not worthy of love?

Are we okay to support them being raped, bombed and killed because we have learnt to hate them so much? This comes from a history of dehumanizing them, calling them animal names and believing lies about them.

Are we okay with the constant in person and online hateful comments directed towards certain groups of people? If we think this is not a thing, we need to look no further than the comment section on local news posts. Especially when it has to do with homeless people for some reason. Hate filled, dehumanizing and calling for violence comments. The comments will make you cry. Literally calling for the harm and death of others sometimes. People throw comments around openly and publicly on social media about beating others up or using a sjambok on them. They sometimes say things like, “violence is the only language they understand!”

Are we okay and almost happy if people we don’t like or hate commit suicide, because there’s one less person in the world in our hateful category?

Are we okay with people being beaten and killed? South Africa is rife with awful behaviour right now towards people seen as foreigners. People being hurt, harmed, killed and thrown out of the country. Xenophobia, by definition, is fear, dislike or hatred of anything or anyone perceived to be foreign or different from oneself. It is typically expressed as prejudice, exclusion or hostility based on the person’s national, ethnic or cultural identity. Very often it comes as political maneuvering or distraction from within or without the country. It’s not based on accurate information. The foreigners are often used as scapegoats, as a target to blame for any domestic problems, like economic instability, unemployment or crime. The target often falls into the ‘vulnerable’ category. The aim is often internal chaos because it’s of benefit to someone else’s agenda for power and control or someone trying to evade their own shortfalls. South Africans need to stand up for what is right and not fall into this trap. We cannot afford to get tripped up by lies dressed up in the language of people being ‘illegals.’

We are seeing this same thing play out in multiple countries around the world. It has not worked out well, nor will it ever. It doesn’t stand up against love your neighbour and the stranger as you love yourself. It doesn’t hold up well to God urging us to love the stranger, to not oppress the widow, orphan, the stranger or the poor. What about practice hospitality to the stranger (who sometimes could be an angel) and being reminded that we too, as citizens of heaven, are strangers ourselves here? Jesus himself says, “I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me a drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me”. Let’s rather put on love, show welcome and practice love.

So, there must be some world views out there that are okay with one or more of the aforementioned scenarios as I have seen comments that would agree with the hatred expressed.

Our personal worldviews are never static; they are always changing as we learn and grow. My worldview has changed dramatically in the past 18 years. There’s 40 years before that where I had been shaped and formed from various sources. That’s a long time to accumulate brain memory. There has been a lot to undo and recalibrate as I have carried on learning and growing and been exposed to other people’s worldviews, my own personal journey of learning more about Jesus and the kingdom of God and more teaching within different churches.

There’s one worldview to take note of, and this one doesn’t change, and that’s the kingdom of God worldview. It’s very different. From everything I have learnt, it’s meant to be a worldview of love. We learn from Jesus’s life and teachings how to live on this earth. I can’t find anything in Jesus’ teachings that teaches me to hate people. In the 40 years of my formation, I had many, many teachings in various and very different churches and spaces. There is a human element involved in how we learn about Jesus and his teachings – there is our own understanding as we read the word of God, and then there’s the people and preachers around us who have added their interpretations too. It’s our choice to ask God for wisdom and our choice to invite the Holy Spirit to fill us, help us understand and lead us forward.

Prejudice and bias are real. We are human. But it comes from what we have been taught. It’s basically a preconceived opinion, attitude or feeling about an individual or group, typically formed without sufficient knowledge or facts. It often manifests as an irrational attitude of hostility or unfair preference.

Interestingly it’s normally aimed at marginalized or vulnerable groups of people. These are the very groups of people Jesus asked us to take extra special care of. Examples would be prejudging of, exclusion, hatred or violence towards any demographic like different races, ethnicities, religions, genders, ages (children and the elderly) or physical and mental capabilities.

We can learn and we can also unlearn and relearn. Our brains have that capacity. It is our choice.

What we can’t do is blend our learnt worldview with the kingdom of God worldview. If we go with the kingdom of God, then we can’t say that some hate is justified and okay. I know there could be many reasons why we could think it might be okay, but there is no teaching on hate coming from Jesus. So, we are in direct opposition to his teaching if we choose to hate people.

We need to stop trying to qualify our hate and give reasons for it. We can’t excuse our way out with spiritual sounding platitudes. Things like, “I love you, but”.  We don’t see Jesus ever doing this. He went above and beyond and all the way to the cross in his great love for everyone in this world.

Our bias is often disproportionately weighted in favour of or against an idea, thing or group, usually in a way that is closed-minded, prejudicial or unfair. Often these are unconscious, but they are learned, so there’s no excuse to not have them challenged if they don’t align with Jesus’s teaching. Jesus had a naturally consistent and positive bias towards his Father and his kingdom. He was always in favour of everything his Father did and said and always aligned with him too.

Can you imagine Jesus putting a target on someone’s back and saying, “Go ahead, hate on them. Stay away from them. Warn others about them. Treat them as less than”. He came to people’s defense in cases where society had created a target out of someone. I am straightaway reminded of the lady caught in adultery and people wanting to stone her. Jesus taught us not to use violence against our enemies, but to love them and to pray for them.

Hate and violence start with seeds planted. These turn into thoughts that have been fed by stories, and most often fear is a part of the story. Violence and hatred are the end points of a story on repeat. Do we know the stories that have led to hate and violence? Does God rubber stamp violence? Does he encourage us to join in? Do we challenge these stories and the resultant actions, or do we ignore them and remain silent? What seeds are we planting for new stories? What will we nourish those seeds with? Where are we drawing the water from so that they will grow healthy and strong? If we nourish the seeds with fear, selfish ways, manipulation, pride, greed and threats, we will harvest hatred and violence. If we nourish the seeds with love, acceptance, welcome, care, peace, selflessness, humility, mercy and grace, we will harvest more love and God’s Shalom.

We have just noted June 16^th on the calendar in South Africa. A dark day in our history of Apartheid. A day marked by extreme violence back in 1976, but it also brought with it the rumblings of change and freedom. Apartheid was birthed and kept in place with stories of fear and prejudice. Fear hates and resists change and uncertainty. It resents equality and accountability. It says that my story matters more and yours matters less. It leads to people believing that they matter more and others matter less. What are the stories that made this happen? There were probably stories of superiority and entitlement. And then stories of those stealing and committing violence, those watching it and staying silent, those justifying it and those benefiting from it. Phobias are formed out of fear driven stories. Phobias are intense, irrational and out of proportion to reality. Once someone has a phobia, they are easily triggered when exposed to the object of their fear. Violent and hateful responses are often the outcome.

What are the stories that God gives us to counter fear, superiority, pride, hatred and violence? Is violence good news for the poor? Is hatred good for those who are lost and in need of a Saviour? Does this sound like the good news of the gospel?

Satan’s manifesto is one of fear and violence. Steal, kill and destroy certainly sounds very violent. He’s always busy with this. But God is always working too and doing more and turning what’s meant for evil into good. This is a story we need to remember and believe.

What is the gospel story? What is God’s language? Is our language shaped by his language? I am the way, the truth and the life. Everything about me is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, redemption, forgiveness, goodness, humility, faithfulness, generosity, justice and faith. I came to bring life and life in abundance. Resurrection power is available and at work in you. My Spirit will convict, change and transform you.

Do we tell this story? Are we sharing the good news of the gospel to counter hatred and violence in our world? Or are we being hoodwinked into living with underlying fear which God promises to cast out with perfect love?

Let’s tell a new story with an old and powerful story. A story of deep love. A kingdom of God story. A story that changes us and changes our world. Let’s always respond with the truth of who God is.

Top picture: Bucket and well artwork by Evelien Burger
Bottom Picture: From a bag at Cotton On Foundation